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El Bachelor Reaches Schmuckasaurus Stature During the Final Rose Ratings Bonanza.

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SPOILER ALERT:  If you have not watched the final episode of Juan Pablo’s season on “The Bachelor”, please stop reading now.

Left: Nikki Ferrell Right: Clare Crawley
Left: Nikki Ferrell
Right: Clare Crawley

In one of the most bizarre, yet strangely entertaining seasons of The Bachelor, we arrived at the Come-to-Jesus…I mean “The Final Rose” show.  To this point, Juan Pablo was rejected by two contestants who left the show, rather than being eliminated by him, and summarily dismissed any woman who asked him anything deeper than “would you like fries with that?”  The finale became the battle of the blondes – Nikki, the Pediatric Nurse and Clare, the hairstylist.

Last week we learned that there may have been a more intimate moment between Juan Pablo and Clare, that he disclosed (bragged about) when he spent time with Andi in the Fantasy Suite.  Whatever was said, was bad enough to have Andi rip into Juan Pablo and and walk off the show.

Ironically, he tweeted “The day has COME… Finally TODAY the soap opera comes to an END… 😃” and “The END of Mi Aventura STARTS now on ABC…” before tonight’s show aired.  Soap opera?  Aventura?  Oh, boy.  We knew the man was clueless, but surely someone at ABC could have found him a publicist, or at least a keeper?  Naw, Juan Pablo went rogue.  And it was priceless.

juan-pablo-doucheIt was no surprise to anyone, but Clare, when Juan Pablo told her he was not choosing her.  After letting the woman declare her love for him, he made some awkward comments about friendship and leaned in, presumably, to hug her.  Clare, held up her hand, told him off and walked away.  In doing so, she earned my respect but she could have saved herself the heartache by listening to her oldest sister who expressed her “displeasure” at the Juan Pablo’s lack of commitment, during the Hometown Dates.   I am sure the women meant to say, “run away from Schmuckasaurus as fast as you can.”  His comments to host Chris Harrison, as he discussed Clare’s exit were truly cringe-worthy and there were audible groans from the studio audience.  Clare chose not want to “reunite” with Juan Pablo during the live show and indicated that he made some deeply inappropriate sexual comments he made about their time together..  In his defense, being a class act was never part of his skill set.

At this point in the show, I was laughing and hoping (praying) that Nikki would follow Clare’s lead and dump Juan Pablo on his tightly sculpted ass.  Alas, it was not to be, as she also professed her love for him.  Typically, this is where the Bachelor would drop to one knee and propose to the last woman standing.   Juan Pablo however, not only did not reciprocate in telling Nikki he loved her, he took it one step further.  He actually told Nikki he had a ring in his pocket, but was not going to give it to anyone.  Instead, he offered her a rose, to continue dating and “getting to know each other,” apparently.  Nikki accepted the rose, but confusion and hurt were evident on her face – to everyone, except Clueless JP.    It was uncomfortable to watch and I am sure rather unpleasant to participate in, or see your loved one go through.

juan-pablo-worst-bachelorOnce this “Final Rose” debacle ended, the live “After the Rose” show started.  My live tweet during this portion, as I stared, open-mouthed, at the continuing train wreck, was Chris Harrison should get hazard pay for Juan Pablo’s season. Welcome to Planet Hot Mess.  I sincerely believed Juan Pablo was planning to defend himself and his actions, because he was embarrassed at how he was portrayed on the show.  In fact, he seemed to have a statement prepared about his home country, Venezuela, and the political unrest there.  What he, and many others on reality TV shows, failed to realize was that the show aired the footage it had.  In other words, they showed the world what he said and how he behaved.   Of course it was edited for television, but they did not create something out of nothing.  He became flustered and angry as he referred to drastic changes in his and Nikki’s plans, and whatever the “big surprise” was that they teased at each commercial break, was never revealed.   (He likely promised the producers a declaration of love or proposal for air time.)

“After the Rose,” also featured some of the previous contestants, including Sean and Catherine, whose wedding was televised a few weeks ago.  Also in attendance were Desiree and Chris, from the most recent “The Bachelorette,” where Juan Pablo was “discovered,” incidentally.   As Juan Pablo continued to dig himself a shallow, then exceedingly deeper grave, the other contestants and Chris Harrison tried, in vain, to throw him a lifeline.  He was given prompt after prompt to declare his love for Nikki on television, and the idiot refused to do so, citing “privacy.”    When Sean pointed out that reality TV stars had no privacy, Juan Pablo proceeded to insult them. He then, turned on Sean, who had, until that very show been his ally.  The quote of the night goes to Catherine, who said “Don’t slap the hand that fed you.”  Someone actually had to explain this to Juan Pablo, during the show.   I was hyperventilating, I was laughing so hard.

But, “Betches Love This,” capture the essence of the episode so well in The Best After The Final Rose Ceremony Recap You’ll Ever Read.

We learned two things tonight.  Just because a man is attractive does not mean he is intelligent, has substance or sensitivity.  And, finally,  ratings for the next Bachelorette, starring Andi Dorfmann, will be through the roof.

I invite you watch along with me.

Update (March 12th):  Juan Pablo wrote a blog for People Magazine that is, according to his tweets, being held up by ABC’s production crew.  Additionally, there seems to have been a “privacy pact” of sorts between the “character” of Juan Pablo and Nikki Ferrell.  He refused to profess his love on television, but did not mind doing so via his “Adventures in Loving You” YouTube video.  Bizarre.  I hope he realizes that all that ABC footage of him and Nikki is property of ABC Network, not him.

New Year, New Look

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Venetian Black Mask
Image is property of: http://shaktiphoto.com/
Used with permission.

Today one of my blogger friends brought a few of us together to support and share our experience and expertise.  This venture – The Social Blogger, the new year, and the photo shoot I participated in last week, prompted a little blog makeover.  I think it will make finding posts easier and encourage me to post more regularly.  Hope you enjoy it.

The next step will be to designate theme days for posts.   Suggestions are welcome.

Top Ten Things Not to Do If Your Book Gets a Negative Review

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I added my own advice as a reader who pays close attention to ALL reviews, and is a member of several Street Teams.  Do not send your Street Team to harass ANY reviewer, “dislike” or “vote down,” and/or leave “helpful comments” for the reviewer. Do not post an angry rant on your Facebook page or blog, decrying negative reviews. Say nothing. Do nothing. It all reflects back on the author and her/his good/poor judgment.

1WriteWay

Here is the 36th installment of Ten Top Lists of What Not to Do by Marie Ann Bailey of 1WriteWay at http://1writeway.com and John W. Howell of Fiction Favorites at http://johnwhowell.com. These lists are simu-published on our blogs each Monday. We hope you enjoy.
Rate this book!
10.  If your book gets a negative review, do not read the review, especially if the rating is one star.  At best, the reviewer will admit the review is based on having read only a couple of pages of your book and you can chide yourself for even bothering to read one word of the review.  At worst, you will read the review so many times  you can quote it by heart, begin to believe it, and eventually get one star tattooed on your back to atone for imagined errors in your career choice.

9.  If your book gets a negative review, do not respond…

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Why Google doesn’t care about hiring top college graduates

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I’ve only worked in one organization that believed this. It was an amazing work experience – collaborative and humble. The most successful, long-term employees were people who had to WORK for what they had. They were prouder of company’s success over their own personal success. Hire people who WANT to learn on the job.  Be an organization that inspires pride in its employees.  The combination is amazing.

“Portal to Hell’s” New Owner: Zak Bagans

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zak_bagans_fuck off ghostsI have mixed feelings about Zak Bagans’ Travel Channel show “Ghost Adventurers,” even though I am a fan. They seem to have a knack for disrespecting spirits and taunting demons. However, their show is a nice contrast to the more serious “The Dead Files,” which takes a methodical, more global approach to examining places with possible paranormal activity. “The Dead Files,” pairs Amy Allan a medium with Steve Di Shavi on each case. Amy and Steve disseminate evidence separately, then provide the families a comprehensive report, with historical data, about events that may have lead to hauntings.   They also provide suggestions on how to deal with any paranormal activity.  Zak and his crew have a more of a “bull in a china shop” approach.

As The Haunted Librarian notes, Zak recently purchased a property in Indiana, known as the “portal to hell.”  He plans to live there, while his team investigates any activity. What could possibly happen? Oh boy.  Dangerous, does not begin to describe the world of hurt they may be unleashing, if they go into that situation ill-prepared and full of piss and vinegar.  In other words, the way they walk into all of their investigations.

API will be discussing this case and possible repercussions on their show, Thursday and I am curious to hear their take. Tune in, folks.

The Haunted Librarian

Supposed "Portal to Hell" House Supposed “Portal to Hell” House

“Portal to Hell’s” New Owner: Zak Bagans

Granted I’m a tad tardy to the discussion, but I’ve decided to jump into to fray. Ghost Adventurer’s Lead Investigator Zak Bagans has purchased the “haunted” house on Carolina Street in Gary, Indiana. He paid $35,000 for the “modest” property. Bagans is quoted as saying: “I really [have] a passion for this stuff… .” This smacks as a publicity stunt!

Charles Reed, the former owner, sold the property days after a local newspaper published a story whereby calling the house the “Portal to Hell.” Former renter Latoya Ammons, along with her three children and mother, moved into the house in 2011. During the following year, Ms. Ammons claims that one child levitated over a bed, another child walked backwards up a wall, ominous footsteps were heard, and the animal elicited strange behavior. Catholic priest Rev. Michael Maginot exorcised…

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Why Shakespeare Should Quit Writing

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Fight the power, Sarah. The menace of Shakespeare MUST be stopped. I shall join your cause, but only if there are cute t-shirts and shoes.

I read the, now infamous, Huffington Post article criticizing J.K. Rowling and a few thoughts came to mind, “girl, listen to your friend next time,” “oh, THAT’S going to leave a mark,” and “just say no to drunk blogging, people.”

Karma sandwich. It’s what’s for dinner.

To read the article that inspired Sarah’s glorious rant, click here: If JK Rowling Cares About Writing, She Should Stop Doing It.  The title alone is a doozy – a call to arms, if you will.  Strap on your bullet-proof snark vest and kiss your writing career goodbye, Toots.

Forbes Discovers “Sunshine City’s” Blossoming Art and Food Scene

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map of st petersburg floridaIn Sampling St. Petersburg’s New Art And Food Scene,  Forbes Travel Guide’s Michelle Doucette provides a glimpse into some of the changes St. Petersburg, Florida has been undergoing to become a destination for art lovers and foodies alike.

I lived in Tampa for almost ten years, before moving to St. Petersburg and can vouch for the eclectic arts scene that exists here.   While the article mentions our new and growing craft beer industry and some of the local breweries, it fails to acknowledge the long-time City, County and private partnerships that have contributed greatly to re-investments in the City of St. Petersburg.  Our City has dedicated green space and dog parks, and a Mayor, Rick Krisemen, who worked  tirelessly throughout his career to ensure our Human Rights Ordinance was developed and passed.  In fact, he was the first elected official to sign last year’s St. Pete Pride Proclamation, which coincided with one of the most successful, family-oriented, Pride celebrations in the country.  (He served on the City Council when he signed the Proclamation and was instrumental in keeping pressure on previous Mayors to sign the Proclamation).

Zeke, a regular patron, enjoys the leash-free area of Fort De Soto Park's Paw Playground.
Zeke, a regular patron, enjoys the leash-free area of Fort De Soto Park’s Paw Playground.

Add in Major League Baseball’s Tampa Bay Rays, museums with diverse collections like The Dali Museum,  the Florida Holocaust Museum and the Museum of Fine Arts,  one of the oldest and largest MLK Day celebrations in the country, our beautiful beaches and year-round great weather and you will begin to see why we love our unique slice of heaven.

I can be found at the dog beach at Fort De Soto, alongside Hubby and our sun-worshipping K9 kids: Zeke, Hannah and Charlie.